Why are so many people rude to those new in their career?
Today I had a meeting with a wonderful lady trying to get her consulting business off the ground. I enjoyed our chat and we spent nearly an hour and a half talking about tools, theory and the world of tomorrow. It was fantastic.
She came across our company and heard good things about the team and I, so she shot me an email. But she also told me:
- She didn’t expect to hear back from me
- She was surprised that I responded so quickly and was happy to meet her
- She was shocked I bought the coffee
It saddened me to know that in today’s society of being too busy to help others out, people have become accustomed to the negative responses (or lack or response at all). Even worse, people in my industry tend to shunt anything that isn’t ‘billable’ or business development related.
This isn’t the first time I’ve heard this.
What a shame…But why?
Why be an asshole?
What purpose does it serve to shunt those who are looking for advice in making a start?
I’ve had this happen to me. I genuinely wanted to chat and learn more about someone’s experiences only to be completely ignored. I’ve also had those awful experiences where you meet with the person only for them to be condescending the whole time, as if someone seeking advice means they are a lesser person.
I believe people do this for a few damaged reasons:
- It helps them feel powerful when they can ignore people who have no monetary value to them
- They treat people condescendingly because it helps them feel like they are superior (even when they might have huge self doubt)
- They are afraid of what it might mean if they help that person and they become a competitor (so what if they do?!?!)
Be a good person
I am not sure about you, but it’s such a good feeling when you can help someone who has absolutely nothing to offer you. It’s one of the greatest forms of giving. I expect nothing in return and I give unfiltered support and connect them to what they need in any way I can, whether it be a referral, resource, book to read, etc.
The next time you are busy and someone wants to pick your brain, here is how to ensure you don’t dismiss the person:
- Remain curious and ask them how you can help
- Find the time and think of it as part of being a productive member of society
- Think about the last time someone supported you when they didn’t have to and what that meant for you
Let’s look after each other. The world is a better place when we do.
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