Florida Is Going to Have Its First Black Governor Because Republican Ron DeSantis Is Dumb

What, me racist?

I had never heard the name Ron DeSantis until a little over a month ago when Andrew Gillum won the Democratic nomination to run for Governor of Florida. DeSantis, Gillum’s Republican opponent, decided it would be a good idea to go on national TV and say, out loud, that Florida voters shouldn’t “monkey this up” by electing Gillum (who is black). And that’s when I knew that DeSantis was going to be a really unbelievably bad candidate.

I don’t mean “bad” as in, “He’s just an awful person!” I mean “bad” as in Ron DeSantis is going to be one of those candidates that after the election is over, people are going to shake their head and say, “What the fuck just happened? Who let this imbecile run for one of the most important jobs in the country?” It’s clear he’s trying to run as a Trump clone but so far, this has failed for pretty much everyone who’s tried it in a general election. Ed Gillepsie was stomped into the ground in Virginia, taking a good chunk of the state legislature with him. Joe Arpaio tried it in Arizona and was crushed. Roy Moore went all in on the Trump Strategem and lost a Senate seat to Democrat Doug Jones. In Alabama. Alabama!

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