America: we’re in real trouble

i must admit that i’ve spent the last couple of days full of glee, watching Republicans’ comical attempts at defending Donald Trump’s shenanigans.

i could watch such videos for hours. but, suddenly it hit me.

stop. stop. stop. before you start bloviating about how i’m disrespecting the American flag, google “US in distress”.

now, i was getting to the fact that our country is leaderless. really. think about it for two minutes. what would happen if something really serious happened to us now. who would try to protect us? put the baby in chief and his pet Chihuahua together; you don’t end up with half a president.

i’m talking to all Americans here. Republicans, Democrats, Independents, Nonvoters. e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e.

we have a president who does not give a fuck about nonwhites. he doesn’t. he shows it all the time. so he won’t protect us, just like he didn’t care about our sisters and brothers in Puerto Rico. could you imagine a president condescendingly throwing paper towels at a crowd of who’ve lost their homes? could you fathom a compassionate leader telling a woman in a church who just showed him how they make potable water from “dirty water” that there’s no way she could drink that? let me help you:

Trump was baffled and disgusted by water purification in Puerto Rico

we don’t have a president. we have a unabashed monster who thinks that he’s the center of the universe and that everybody (including his son) is disposable and on this earth to serve him. what really got me was the revelation that our president has fun sleeping with his friends’ wives, which makes me wonder about his friends, and his friends’s wives. ew.

women hold such a precious place in my heart. i spent nine months inside one. i have a caring mom, an incredibly smart sister, and the most precious nieces any uncle could have. i have female friends that bring smiles to my sullen face. our president HAS NO RESPECT FOR WOMEN. TO HIM WOMEN, ALL WOMEN, ARE HERE FOR HIS AMUSEMENT. he literally, literally, makes me sick.

he deserves absolutely no respect. when i hear people saying that we must respect him, i just think about how he treats women. he gives no respect. HE GETS NO RESPECT. (my apologies to Mr. Rodney Dangerfield.)

some years ago, i had the sweetest girlfriend. she loved me and wanted us to get married. however, she had an influential uncle in her extended family who didn’t want me to be with her because i’m black.

my girlfriend and her family hail from China. she tried teaching me some Mandarin. i remember only how to say chicken. (ugh, yeah. well, i like chicken.) her parents, however, had accepted me as a son, and her sisters and brother as their brother. but this uncle was making life difficult for her, her mom, her sisters, and brother because of their relationships with me. i stupidly thought that brining kids into that environment would not be good. so i broke up with her.

i consider that decision THE WORST DECISION I’VE MADE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. i regret it every day. i know that had i chosen to journey with my girlfriend, we’d be very happy., with a couple of beautiful mixed-race kids. i let her down. i let myself down. instead i’m alone, a failing entrepreneur, who cries every now and then. and now.

i was clinically depressed about a year ago and tried to kill myself. i took a bunch of sleeping pills, together with alcohol and Jarritos (i don’t like alcohol that much.). after taking about fifteen pills i was knocked out. i was tripping hard for the following 36 hours. i was talking to people who weren’t there and making all kinds of noise. lucky for me, the people in the hotel didn’t call the police. thanks to family and friends i’m here, breathing and walking.

i’m on antidepressants now. but i’m still alone trying to get my business going. to make myself feel good, i tell people that my business is the family i didn’t have. it’s not true.

i’ll keep trying until i fulfill my dream. i know i’ll do it because i’m incredibly stubborn. but i would happily give this all up for a life with her. i chose misery instead of happiness. why? why did i do such a stupid thing?

America, why? why did we elect Donald Trump for president? out of spite? because he said the right words? because we were mad at our situations? because he’s a racist like us? for the judges? because he’s a successful businessman?


did we hate Hillary THAT much?

i know that we’ll regret making that decision for years to come, just like i regret not marrying her.

America is leaderless, and the rest of the world knows it. what are we going to do about this? just wait until he decides to press the button?

luckily, the Koreas are talking, without him, but because of him. i know, i hate that he’s right about this. I H.A.T.E I.T.

the good news is that we’re a country of laws, traditions, and justice. although our president is substantially damaging America, our country is strong. he’s not a king. he’s not even special. he’s just a spoiled brat who started out with a fortune, lost it, and got more from his father. fucked that up, and got another bailout from his father. then he stiffed contractors. then he stole from students. ah, yeah, “successful businessman.”

we’ll survive this colossal mistake just like i’m surviving my own.

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